Gov Potion No. 9 | March 11, 2008 | 20:52

So, Eliot Spitzer is the latest public figure to be caught doing what the general public deems "shameful" activities. All of it's still alleged, of course, because it hasn't been proved, outright, that he's a john to a "high-class" (read: expensive) hooker. Who is anyone kidding, though? He's all but copped to it and he'll probably come out with it all together and resign his governorship because of the public's undeserved moral outrage.

I'm not condoning Spitzer's actions; he's a hypocrite of the highest order. The man is supposedly "Mr. Clean" fighting against corruption, avarice and sexual vagary ... and now topples from his pedestal beneath the weight of allegations that he partook in sex for pay, and apparently without wrapping up his dick -- despite having a wife he likely fucks unsheathed.

This scandal, his shame, the likely implosion of his political career ... it's all so bloody delicious. I love it when rich white men get their comeuppance. I love the irony that the crusader against prostitution himself solicited sex from a whore. I'm going to relish every minute of this sanctimonious prick falling to earth and being driven face first into the shit-storm of outrage and calls for his head.

I hope his wife leaves him so fast that she's gone like a fart in the wind. I hope his kids excommunicate the sonofabitch. I hope he finds himself cold and alone with nothing but his millions to comfort him ... and to pay for the company he's going to desperately need to stave off the urge to kill his ugly, bald, simian ass.

I'm at the lowest depth of my disdain for humanity and Captain Morality has only reinforced that sentiment. The same idiots who heaped adulation on this asshole are now calling for his ouster; I'd like to see them get swept into the gutter right along with him.

It's the same old shit with politicians because the moronic constituents in this so-called democracy keep buying into the cult of personality bullshit that keeps these people rich and in power, while the average citizen can barely make ends meet. Everyone who voted for Spitzer deserves to be fined for the injustice they've perpetrated on the rest of us.

Me, I don't vote; I couldn't live with myself for electing to office some hubris-ridden asshole with a messianic complex. The only people I trust are those that scoff at the idea of administering others. Anyone fast-tracking themselves into management, stumping for office or generally trying to tell other people how to live, implementing policies to dictate what is and is not acceptable ... that person could cease to exist at a moment's notice and it would confront me none.

Crash and burn, motherfucker. Crash and motherfucking burn.