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Kings or Queens? | June 04, 2006 | 22:50

I may be moving to Queens.

Tomorrow, I'm looking at a place in Bay Ridge, which is in Brooklyn, which, if it's better than the place I saw today in Queens, will probably be my new home.

Today, though, I went to Briarwood and looked at an enormous, beautiful apartment in a gorgeous neighborhood. It was quiet ... serene ... everything that Brooklyn isn't. There was grass and there were trees. The road curved. How novel. The price is a bit high, I think, considering how remote this place is, but then, I'm willing to pay a fairly high price for my well-being, sanity and peace of mind.

However, if Bay Ridge proves to be as nice, apartment-wise, I think I won't be trading up on Brooklyn. Bay Ridge is one of those places that's mostly exempt from what I consider the "Brooklyn Beatdown" ... the rampant barrage of boorish and crude, ill-mannered and threatening people, garbage on the sidewalks, neighborhoods not cared for by the people who live there.

The Brooklyn Beatdown is what's turned me on to Queens. However, Bay Ridge may just be an oasis amidst the shithole that Brooklyn already is and is further becoming.

We'll see.

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